Wednesday, May 21, 2008

just need to get this off my chest

i am not homophobic. i even have a lot of gay and lesbian friends. because i am posting this in my blog, i have the urge to stress that i respect people regardless of sexual orientation or gender preference and that i support their fight against discrimination.

last saturday i brought my son and my sister's kids to a resort for a day of swimming. since it was a weekend there were just too many people there. earlier that day we have already noticed 4 or 5 overexcited gays in mid- or late 20's, making their way through the entrance gate. we've lost sight of them after we settled in the cottage we rented. my son went to the pool as soon as he had dropped his things.

my son is 13 and is a good swimmer, plus i have checked that there were at least two lifeguards in every pool, so i was pretty sure he would be safe. he was in the wave pool while i and the other 2 kids were in the lap pool. minutes later my son came to us, he told me that the gays we saw earlier were asking for his name.

my son is not homophobic either. but these gays started to follow him everywhere which made him uncomfortable. he said they were asking volley of questions he chose not to tell me. kai transferred from one pool to another to elude them, even going to the deepest parts of the pool. unfortunately, they swam as good as he did. i saw the gays too. they were in skimpy swimsuits, two of them have grown breasts. they couldn't go unnoticed because they have been shrieking almost the whole time.

i tried to reassure my son that for as long as they were not getting their hands maliciously on him he was fine. since the gays were in hearing distance from us i said i'd confront them if they ever did anything nasty. they left after that.

later, my son went to the male shower room to wash up, minutes after my sister saw the gays went in the same shower room. much as i wanted to hold on to my manners i had to rush there. by the door i callled my son's name as loud as i could. there he was, standing in the shower room clasping his towel to his chest and looked anxious. he ran out as soon as he saw me said he didnt know how he could put on fresh clothes. he did tell me that when the gays arrived they told him they will take shower with him.

back in our cottage i asked how he felt, he told me he was terrified. "hindi ako galit sa mga gay mommy, pero wag naman ganun." it was only then that i realized how it has affected my son. i did notice that while he was in the pool he was unusually quiet and pensive. plus, he stayed near us most of the time.

we would raise hell when an adult male would trail a young girl everywhere. sadly, when it's gays who would do that, even in the clear view of eveyone people find it rather amusing, even ordinary. the gays were obviously on to my son but if they could follow him everywhere i dont think there was anyone among those who were near him bothered to tell off the gays to stay away from the boy. and in my case i had thought that for as long as they were not touching him no harm was done. (i'd like to be gender fair, but i can't think of cases of adult woman maliciously chasing young boys)

the incident at the resort made me regret that i was deferential to those gays. i maintain my trust and belief that it is not a trademark of the gays to be vulgar or indecent. but some just are. the unfortunate thing is that they think their being gay was a license to do just what they did. what they did is tantamount to harassment. what do the child rights advocate call that? my son is only 13. he didn't know how to fend off innuendos sexual in nature. even if the gays weren't to the extent physical they made a dent on my son's person.



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